After starting on wall paper removal and completing my first Spanish lesson, I look over my list of things I can do during this period of isolation.  I chuckle because it resembles a “to-do” list.  It’s entirely focused on doing-doing-doing.  That’s when I realize that I’ve done it again. I’ve neglected that which is so easily set aside; time in silence.  What a great time to establish the daily habit of silence and meditation, even journaling.  Sure, I do it here and there, now and then, at times more consistently than others.  But right now, there are no interruptions, no appointments to rush off to, no meetings, events or socials.  Basically…no excuses!

In our rush-rush culture, do we busy ourselves so much because we dread going into what we suspect are the “dungeons” of our inner selves?  I, for one, am more likely to jump into doing a task than to sit quietly and be still.  I wonder what would happen if each of us took even just a portion of the time we have available right now to turn inward and become a bit more introspective.  I’m not talking about enumerating all the possible consequences of the virus and the multitude of gloomy suppositions.  I’m just talking about sitting quietly and “visiting” with our inner selves and examining closely what we find there.  Instead of the dreaded dungeon, we may actually discover a refreshing private garden.  A non-judgmental visit just to explore and to discover what it is we need at this point in time.  If it’s peace, joy, and love, I suspect that’s exactly what we will find with regular visits.  Becoming less of a stranger and more of a friend to ourselves will be an additional but no lesser bonus. 

I suspect that balancing doing with being will always be a tug-and-pull for me.  I continue the quest because of its immeasurable value.  Surely, I’m not the only one who struggles with taking the time for something I know is good for me but too often letting it slide?  I continually have to course-correct.

During this time of isolation, I commit to creating a habit that brings me calmness and serenity, insight and knowledge of self; a habit that will support me long after this period of confinement is over.  Ultimately, this is the true gift that is offered me during this “forced pause!”  

~Zanne
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