After metaphorically being tossed about by the waves this summer, I finally have my feet back under me.  With distance comes perspective, for sure, but occasionally, I just need a little bit of help from someone willing and able to pluck me out of the riptide I find myself in.  

In an email to a friend, I wrote/complained about the challenges I experienced over the summer.  She sympathized with me about all I’d been through and how difficult it must have been.  She ended her email by saying: “There’s no need to write me for a while, but when you do, perhaps you’ll be able to tell me a story or two about unexpected relief and good things that have surfaced from these unsettling times.”

When I read that, it was the furthest thing from my mind and really not what I felt like doing.  Though looking for the silver lining in everything has always been my way of responding to life’s challenges, last summer, I was caught up in a different sort of riptide…one of self-pity.  Her simple request, forced me to look for the good in each of the events that happened. It was like getting back on a bike after having taken a few really bad spills…reluctantly yet with some familiarity. 

Once I looked at the summer’s events from this perspective, it wasn’t long before I identified good that came from each one.

With the issue of my temporary loss of eyesight in one eye, I was blessed with feeling and knowing my husband’s love and concern on a very deep level.  We were in this together and I felt wrapped in a warm blanket.

With my in-law’s situation, I noticed that my father-in-law felt our care and concern for him, for perhaps the first time in his life.  He has seen that we are there for him and will not abandon him in his hour of need.  We’ve been able to express our concern for his wellbeing in such a way that he has actually received and internalized it.  He now feels we’re by his side.  I believe this is grace.

As much as we didn’t want my husband to get Covid, the gift in this was much needed downtime.  NO ONE wanted to be around us.  They knew we had to quarantine.  In a crazy kind of way, we felt blessed for this undisturbed time.

A good friend is someone who acknowledges your struggles and even commiserates with you for a time, but also understands you well enough to know when you need a nudge.  Then, ever-so-gently, she encourages you to take baby steps toward helping yourself.  This is what a good friend does…I am so blessed…

~Zanne
InSearchOfAuthenticity.com
© 2021 Zanne